The Phrases We Say

There are phrases I say (and hear often) in everyday life that I think are worth mentioning.  We say and hear them so often but do we really stop and think about what they mean or rather what the connotation is?

“No worries”-  When I say no worries it’s usually when someone is turning me down for something.  I say no worries so that the person doesn’t feel bad about saying no to me and so that the person doesn’t think I am upset about it.  But when someone says no worries to me I feel bad immediately!  I think that I have hurt their feelings or upset them because I can’t do what they’ve asked me or I cannot help them the way they would like.

“No big deal”-  When I say no big deal it’s usually when someone says no to something I’ve asked them to do or if I have asked for a favor or to borrow something.  I say no big deal to show that I really don’t care and it’s not that important to me.  When someone says no big deal to me I usually think yikes, I think this was important to this person too bad I cannot help or maybe there is something I can do.

“No rush”-  When I say no rush to someone it’s because I have asked for some help, some information, for an answer with no timeline on when I would like for a response.  When someone says “no rush” to me I am alerted and I try my best to get back to the person right away.

“No offense” - This one and the next one make me laugh.  For whatever reason we feel the need to say these things.  When I say “no offense” I am introducing a topic that may be touchy or sensitive to the person I am talking to and genuinely do not want the person to take offense.  When someone says no offense to me, I try my hardest, but sometimes I get a tinged bit offended. 

and

“Don’t take this the wrong way”-  I think this phrase is more negative in nature than the previous one.  When I say don’t take this the wrong way I am usually going to give some type of constructive criticism (unless it’s a sarcastic joke).  But I am not meaning it to upset the other person and am not trying to be mean.  When someone says this to me, I usually feel like what they are saying is a bit mean spirited or judgy. 

I thought this was an interesting exercise to think about these phrases that just come out of our mouths all the time.  I know, at least for me, what I mean when I say these things are opposite of what I take these words to mean if someone says them to me.