Rules are meant to be broken!

Am I the only one who has rules for my kids but doesn’t really follow all of them?...Anyone? I justify this by telling myself that kids don’t follow all the rules anyways and it’s our job as parents to set them up for success by laying the foundation and groundwork.  We give them “rules” and guidelines that are ideal and then they break most of them and we just keep going at it and try to enforce best we can. I try my best to be a good role model and follow my own rules when my kids are around. But there are just some rules that I keep finding myself breaking, when I am alone and sometimes when they are around (and I have been caught! *cringe*).  
Here are the rules that I commonly break (to name a few):

1. No shoes in the house (hey I am in a hurry sometimes and just need to grab something before I head out).

2. No eating on the couch (because it’s so nice to lounge at night with a snack).

3. No eating in bed (don’t judge).

4. Always clean up after yourself (I try but sometimes I just can’t).

5. Don’t forget to say please and thank you (anyone else bark orders to their kids like a drill sergeant?).

6. Don’t talk to strangers (I am chatty by nature).

7. Don’t eat candy...in hiding...in the pantry...before a meal (enough said).

8. Don’t run in the house (see number 1).

9. Use your inside voice (see number 5).

10. Don’t talk with your mouth full (see 6).

11. Be patient (this is a really tough one for me).

12. Treat others how you would like to be treated (see 5).

Independence is a privilege and a huge responsibility

My husband and I see the value in instilling independence in our children.  But for me, logistically, being the person who is with them most of the time, I get stressed out about watching my kids do things for themselves when it makes a mess that I know I will need to clean up.

My kids love being in the kitchen.  We want our kids to know how to cook and bake, and be comfortable in the kitchen.  And they are comfortable. However, what this means is any time I am in the kitchen (usually in a hurry) trying to pull together a meal or trying to savor some alone time in the kitchen, one or both of my kids pull up a stool and ask to help.  I prefer to have the kids in the kitchen on weekends or days when we are not in a rush, and where myself and my husband can be there to set them up with a station and help them along. But on days where I am just trying to get food on the table or trying to prep something before we head out the door, I don’t want the kids in the kitchen getting in to everything and making messes.  Half the time I shoo them away and tell them this isn’t the time; half the time I stop what I am doing, think of a project they can do in the kitchen (washing or cutting veggies, mixing something, or measuring things) and set them up to work on something, knowing that there will be a much bigger mess in the kitchen than I anticipated. The kids are always cheery and happy to be in the kitchen with me or my husband and I am usually happy they are there, but sometimes I roll my eyes inside thinking how much easier it would be if it was just me.

I also have issues with personal grooming habits.  I want my kids to be able to take care of their own personal hygiene and grooming because that will be their own responsibility as they get older, but it drives me crazy when they don’t brush their teeth well, brush their hair properly, or get dressed sloppily.  I find that sometimes I interject and will help them brush their teeth, wipe their faces, do their hair, and help them get dressed because I just can’t stand to see the way they do it. I do understand that I am doing them no favors and that I have to let them figure it out.  I still feel like their little bodies are an extension of mine and it’s my responsibility to keep them clean and tidy. But I won’t be able to do this forever and they need to self-monitor when they need to and how they should handle their own hygiene and grooming.

At the end of the day these little people are little citizens of the world.  I need to tell myself constantly that it’s our job as parents to set them up for success, guide and teach them habits and principles for the future, and then at some point, little by painstaking little, we need to let go. *insert ugly cry emojie*

To DIY or not DIY

When we started a family I felt like the time left in my days were seriously crunched.  I am constantly running around doing things and filling my time up with taking care of all the tasks that come along with family life and managing a household.  In doing these things I have had to really decide for myself what is worth doing and what I can let go of. It is a constant struggle for me. I am confronted with so many choices every single day.  And one of the choices that I find really difficult is to decide between what to do myself and what to outsource or pay for. This can be in the form of meals and cooking, home improvement projects, educational resources, personal grooming, car repairs, financial and business decisions.  I think it comes as no surprise that sometimes you just have to pay for conveniences, for things to be ready-made (even though you can make it yourself) or for someone else to do things (even though you can do it yourself). I value my time and my family’s time so if something takes up that limited resource (time), I often will decide to take the most time-saving approach and just pay for it.  I feel lame sometimes because I know am capable of teaching my kids piano, I can make my own marinades and salad dressings, I can pickup and assemble all my own furniture, and we can do our own taxes, but we have had to weigh that out and sometimes we let the professionals do it. It hurts my pride, but doing this frees up more time and energy for other things.

Why are you asking?

I have a habit of asking a lot of questions.  It’s my way of getting to know someone and finding out more about a person.  I am genuinely a curious person and I am intrigued by people and where they are from, what they do, and why they do it!  It is how I make conversation and how I connect with people. It is also how I understand where a person is coming from, their position and views on things, and how they think.  People have such vastly different lives and we all have different views on things.  

I also really like to learn from people around me.  I know my way is certainly not the best way to do things and I want to know how people do things.  What systems do they have in place, what routines, and what decisions and compromises have they made to get them where they are.  Maybe I agree maybe I won’t but to find out more from others around me gives me something to consider and think about.

As much as I love asking questions I really feel uncomfortable answering them.  Most people are so nice to answer all my questions and follow-up questions. But, I myself find that I am almost defensive if people ask me questions.  I automatically assume that if they are asking me questions that they are doubting me and second guessing me. Isn’t that terrible? That is almost never the case but my mind jumps to that conclusion.  I ask my husband all the time, before answering him, “wait, why are you asking?” Poor guy cannot even ask me “Why did you buy another package of cheese?” without me getting defensive.

I don’t know why I can’t just answer without thinking too much about why the person is asking.  Especially since I myself dish out questions all day!

My handwriting is embarrassing!

I have been working with my 3rd grade son on his penmanship.  He has been practicing his printing and we have been working on cursive.  I know cursive isn’t taught in our school and at many schools, and in fact, many adults these days don’t write in cursive.  But I thought it would be nice for him to learn what cursive is and how to write in cursive if he ever chose to in the future.  A handwritten letter or a note in beautiful handwriting is always a special surprise!

These days I find that all my “writing” is via a keyboard on my computer, laptop, or cell phone.  And when I do sit down to write a card, letter, or even a check, my handwriting is so sloppy. I have never had nice, neat writing.  I think so fast and want to jot down my thoughts as fast as I can, so my handwriting is never methodical. My letters run together and it’s a wonder any recipient knows what any of my words say.  I always tell myself to slow down before I sit down to write something but in haste my words always end up looking like a jumbly mess.

My apologies to any of you who has ever received a handwritten anything from me. It’s not one of my strong points. I tell my son all the time to slow down and make each letter clear and tidy, I need to learn to do the same. As I get older I appreciate those who have really perfect handwriting. I think it says a lot about your personality. I am sure my handwriting says that I don’t care about what my writing looks like. But I really do care about the meaning behind my words, I just can’t be bothered with actually forming the written word nicely on paper.

Throwing Money Down the Toilet

Everyone makes mistakes, sure, we all do.  But the mistakes that really get me sometimes are the really silly, dumb mistakes that I could have avoided, and that end up costing a pretty penny.  What happened? I’ll tell you.

I was in the bathroom and went to grab a new toilet paper roll, and I accidentally hit a little bottle of air freshener, it landed in the toilet, while it was flushing...it was a domino effect of all these random things happening in succession.  In the beginning I thought no big deal I will just plunge the toilet, no luck. I thought okay I will get a glove, stick my hand in and get the bottle out, also no luck. Then I started to panic. I called a plumber and that afternoon he came and told me either this would cost me a few hundred dollars if he could get it out, or it would cost me a few hundred dollars for him to try to get it out, and then the cost of a new toilet plus installation.  Ah!

I was so mad at myself and kept thinking if I could go back in time and just do one thing differently or if I had acted just a little bit faster or had faster reflexes I wouldn’t be in such a pickle.  The plumber came back the next day, after doing basically surgery on my toilet (he had so many crazy tools that did all these different things), he got the bottle out! I was really happy, more thrilled than I thought I would ever be to have a toilet surgeon at my house, freeing this bottle from my toilet, and to have my working toilet back.  I happily paid him by this point and he went on his merry way. I thought I saw a little smug look or a chuckle a few times when the plumber talked to me, but I really didn’t care.  

So, I have to say I was hard on myself for literally throwing money down the toilet.  But mistakes happen. And lesson learned, always keep the toilet seat down!

I'm Late, I'm Late, For a Very Important Date

Summertime chill has got me good. We have been staying up later, waking up later, and I have been a lot more lax about our schedule. At the beginning of summer I was trying to be a little stricter about our schedule and doing more scheduled activities with the kids. I am one of those people that always always always wears a watch. Like that rabbit in Alice in Wonderland, I am always running around with a watch and looking at the time saying “I’m late, I’m late, for a very important date! No time to say hello, goodbye, I’m late I’m late I’m late. I am kind of a slave to my watch!

After a few weeks of summer and outdoor activities, I got a really unattractive watch tan. So I decided that I would just not wear a watch for a few days and hope to get some sun and get rid of the funky tan. I figured I would just use my cell phone for the time and clocks around the house. I was nervous I might not stay on schedule and that I wouldn’t get my important calls and texts. See, I have an Apple Watch. And I was so used to getting notifications of emails, texts, and missed calls constantly.

This ended up being such a good exercise for me. So after a day or two I noticed that I wasn’t really missing anything important by not having my Apple Watch on, giving me instant notices all the time. I checked my phone enough throughout the day when I had down time to catch up on things and that worked out fine. I liked not being bothered and distracted constantly by the buzz of the watch for scheduling items, to dos, texts, emails and phone calls. Anything important I could get on my phone. And as far as the time went I had enough clocks around me and my phone still, so all good there.

Funny thing is, now that I have gotten more used to not wearing a watch, my watch tan is still there! So not sure if or when it’ll ever go away! Jokes on me!

Scootering is cool, right?

So we have a new family hobby...scootering.  Our kids have been scootering for a few years now, and now that our youngest is proficient and downright speedy, we have been running along side the kids during our supposed-to-be leisurely strolls.  We realized after a few outings that we just cannot keep up with them! 

I came up with the bright idea that my husband and I should get scooters of our own and we could scooter with the kids.  That way we could keep up with their pace, get a little exercise!?, and make a family hobby out of it.

We ordered scooters for myself and my husband and off we went.  There was a bit of a learning curve, especially for me. I didn’t realize there was balancing involved in scootering so I teetered and tottered for a few weeks.  But I think I have gotten the hang of it. But I am still way behind the kids! The older I have gotten I am just more afraid of speed and falling so I am constantly scootering with one foot on the brake and stopping every once in awhile and avoiding bumps on the path.  My husband has a need for speed and has been able to keep up with the kids, so I am relieved for that.

What surprised me about getting a scooter was how freeing and relaxing it would be!  Something about zooming along and feeling the wind in my hair is almost a little bit exhilarating?  What can I say? I don’t get out much. I am really glad my husband agreed to humor me and get the scooters, and not only that, actually use them!  The kids are excited for our rides and I look forward to them too. Getting out of our comfort zones is a good thing! 

How big of a deal is it...really?

One thing I really struggle with as a parent (among many things) is how big of a deal to make something when it comes to disciplining my kids.  My approach has always been to go with my gut reaction, which is often times to nip something in the bud and make a huge deal out of it so that my child understands how wrong they are and that they should never repeat the mistake.  

I have found over the years that there are a few things wrong with my approach.  One, it is exhausting. Making a “big deal” out of every mistake your child makes becomes a constant theatrical show and I am no actress so it really takes a lot out of me.  Two, my “gut reaction” is often my instinctual reaction which is emotional and is not always logical. My instincts are usually to get very upset, yell, scream, and come down really hard on my child.  It can be shocking and upsetting to my kids and they could shut down and not listen. Three, when everything is a “big deal” it makes nothing a big deal. When I am making a huge deal out of not cleaning up messes, not sharing, fighting with a sibling, talking back, saying potty words, the list goes on, my saying anything just loses its effect.

I am a fiery person so it’s hard for me to control my temper.  Part of why I like writing so much is that I am much more methodical when I am writing than when words are spewing out of my mouth straight from my head with little filter.  The wrong things often come out! And once they come out you can’t take them back. I have lost my temper with my kids more times than anyone can count and have issues apologies to match.

I am working on picking my battles each and every day.  Choosing when to act like I don’t care or really just not care about the little things.  And really planning out how I want to approach my child when they have really done something that I need to address and help my child understand and change their behavior.

I anticipate that this will always be an issue for me.  I always think about how one little thing can lead to larger problems down the line so I want to fix and change my child’s behavior constantly.  But in reality it’s impossible and I want to really let the small things slide and focus on the things that really will matter. I hope that this helps my relationship with kids too.  So they don’t feel like I am constantly “on them” about every move that they make.

All I want is a basic toaster!

Recently our trusty, family-staple of a kitchen appliance, toaster stopped working out of nowhere.  We love our toaster, like we get the warm-fuzzies and “want to cuddle it” love our toaster. We use it daily often multiple times a day.  We make wheat toast, bagels, english muffins, sourdough toast, and heat up french toast in it. We like ourselves some toast in this house!  When my son discovered the toaster wasn’t working, we all were in shock for a few minutes. Then my husband and I tried several times to fix it, but sadly the toaster was burned out and done.  

I thought for a millisecond that maybe we should replace our toaster with a “toaster oven.”  We here they are all the rage these days and can not only make all the toast you could want but it can reheat leftover pizza or chicken nuggets and even make things from scratch like a roast chicken.  I had a toaster oven years ago and to be honest I didn’t get what the buzz was about. I either torched every item I was reheating or my toast was soggy and I could never get that perfectly crunchy brown crust that I like on my toast.  So I threw it out and got a basic toaster. I have had family members and friends comment how I could live without a toaster oven. But I have survived just fine. We use the toaster for all the toast and sliced bread related things we want to make.  Everything else.. * gasp* goes in our oven. It sound scary and big and so inefficient but I think with our lifestyle and the way we cook the oven just makes sense. I seldom will reheat just one piece of pizza and I am never needing to eat that very second so I will usually just throw things to reheat or roast in the oven, do a few chores, and it’s ready for me and my family.

So we did get a new toaster.  We ordered it on Amazon ASAP and it arrived within 2 days.  We all breathed a sigh of relief to see the brand new shiny toaster on our counter.  Beckoning someone to put in a slice of bread or two.

Handling Kids with Kid Gloves

I was the mom who always put those tiny infant mittens on my babies.  I bought them before my babies were born and proceeded to buy many more once they were born to make sure I had plenty of backups if we lost some or had to wash them.  It’s funny in my own baby pictures I am wearing similar baby mittens, albeit maybe a little old-fashioned, but really the same trusty infant gloves my parents put on me, that I chose to buy for my babies to protect them from scratching their little faces with their sharp tiny nails.  I don’t think I checked any baby supply list or got a recommendation for these gloves, it was just in my head that those were “must haves” as far as baby items go.

When my daughter was born almost 4 years ago, my brother and sister-in-law came to visit the baby.  My brother-in-law, visiting from Germany, thought the baby mittens were the strangest things. He asked what they were and why on earth we were using them, even after my sister-and-law and I explained to him that they are to protect babies from scratching their faces.  He said he had never seen gloves like that before and did not understand the point of using them. I chalked it up to cultural differences and didn’t think about it again. Until I was listening to a podcast recently where the speaker had said her friend, a pediatrician, told her that it bothered her so much when people used baby mittens.  She said whenever she saw parents using them she told the parents to get rid of the little gloves right away and that the whole point is to let the babies scratch themselves so that they learn not to scratch themselves. And if you wrap their hands up so they don’t know the effects of what they are doing, they won’t later know that they shouldn’t scratch their faces.

I know I am not alone in thinking that babies are babies and they are tiny and defenseless.  When they are born we want to protect them from any discomfort or pain and if that means baby gloves, then we buy 20 pairs of baby gloves and make sure the baby has them on whenever he or she is awake.  But being out of the baby stage now for a few years I wonder if this pre-protection mentality has bled into other aspects of my parenting. Actually I don’t wonder so much as I know that it does. If I foresee that an action, circumstances, or situation that my child could be put in may cause discomfort, pain, or adverse reaction, I do my best to set things up so that it won’t happen.  I put pants on my kids if I think they’re going to possibly skin their knees on their bikes or scooters, I cover my kids head to toe when it’s raining outside so they don’t have to wear wet clothes, I cool off all their food before I call them to eat so they don’t have to blow their hot food when they’re hungry, and I jump in if I see my kids fighting or if they have any issues with friends while on a playdate.  Call it helicoptering parenting, call it whatever you want, it’s my instinct as a parent to jump in and do these things. But I realize that by doing this I could be shielding my kids from short-term discomfort but also inhibiting their long-term growth. I hope to be more mindful of this and take a few steps back to let my kids have the learning experiences that will make them more resourceful and better able to cope with their adult lives.  I forget sometimes I am not raising children, I am raising human beings.

Bonus Trash Cans- Home Hack

It really excites me to find little hacks to make daily activities easier.  And throwing things in the trash is something we do all day many times each day.  It is a must, a necessity that we all have to deal with. It’s not glamorous but not having a trash can in the right place can be enough to drive you crazy!  Most of us have trash cans in the kitchen, bathroom, and in our bedrooms. I wanted to share ideas for “bonus” trash cans in places that you might not already have one to make life a little easier.  Here are some bonus trash can ideas:

1. In the Car-  I bought a reusable trash can bag from Amazon that attaches to the back of the passenger seat in my car so that my kids can throw their trash in the bag and not on the floor of the car, thus keeping the car neat and tidy!

2. On the kitchen counter- I use a big bowl on my kitchen counter when I am cooking as a “garbage bowl” for vegetable / fruit peels, egg shells, and packaging when I am cooking.  That way I am not dragging trash back and forth to the trash while I am cooking, saves time and it’s cleaner. I just empty the bowl when it’s full.

3. In the Laundry room- I have a trash can on top of my washing machine for clothing tags, emptying pockets, and for the lint from the dryer.  This really eliminates a lot of junk accumulating on top of the washer and dryer.

4. Under my vanity near the closet in my master bath-  I have a trash can under my vanity near my closet for clothing tags, q-tips, tissue, makeup wipes, cotton balls, makeup/beauty products/toiletry packaging, and my contacts.  I can easily just reach under and throw things away while I am washing up, doing my morning/evening routine, or putting away laundry.

To the Left to the Left…

Both of my kids are left-handed.  My husband and I are not. My dad and mother-in-law are both left-handed but were trained to write with their right hands.  My husband and I didn’t have any preference for our kids to be right or left-handed. We both figured the kids would figure it out themselves and whatever felt natural, we would just let it be.  Both of our families felt very strongly that we should train our kids to be right-hand dominant because it was “mainstream” and would make things easier. In Vietnam apparently a long time ago, kids who wrote with their left hands and used ink would smear on their papers and that would cause a lot of problems.  And for my dad who still eats with his left hand, it’s always a shuffle at big family dinners as to who will sit next to him so they don’t bump arms and elbows when they are eating. We don’t think these are big issues.

When our oldest, our son, was a baby we noticed he liked doing things with his left hand and had read that babies will go back and forth.  When he got older and started eating and later writing he chose to do so with his left hand as well. When he started sports his left handedness was also very apparent.  People notice but it hasn’t been a big deal or caused us any real issues. When our daughter was born we kind of assumed she would be right-handed only because it seemed unlikely both of our kids would be lefties.  She will be 4 later this year and seems to have made it clear to us she is also left-handed. This has been a little controversial in our families as I mentioned before they think being left-handed makes life harder.  They think as parents it is our job and our duty to teach them to use their right hands. When we explain, especially to the great-grandparents, that the kids want to do things with their left hands, they answer that it’s because we didn’t show them or train them.

As the years have gone by and the kids have gotten older the discussion about our kids being left-handed has died down.  It is what it is and people have come to accept it. There are some things that sure my husband and I think we should train our kids to do or be or to train out of their behavior, but their left-handedness is not one of them.  We want them to do what feels right and natural for them, and to embrace it. They were made that way for a reason. Plus, at meals they can always sit next to each other !

Taking a Different Path

In line with my habitual nature, I do not usually deviate from the routes that I take to get to and from places I frequent.  I figure it’s what I am used to and the paths that I take are the easiest and best ways to get from place to place. Recently at a park playdate with some friends, on our way out of the park parking lot I was behind the car of one of our friends.  I knew that the mom was driving her kids to a lesson that was in the same direction as where we lived, so I followed her out. Then I realized when we got to the light that she was going to go straight and down the hill, while I always turned right and then left to get to the bottom of the hill.  Our home and neighborhood is at the bottom of a residential hill. I ended up following the car in front of me that day and took a different path to get home. My kids realized right away that this wasn’t the usual path and asked me right away where we were going. I told them we are going home but just a different way.  They didn’t understand why I would do this, but I explained I wanted to see what it was like and maybe it was a better way.

Lo and behold I rather liked this different route to get home.  It made more sense, I felt like I was going with the flow of traffic and it was more scenic and less jerky than my usual path.  It was almost more peaceful of a drive. This new route has now become my favorite way to get home when I am coming from that particular direction.  I am not sure if it saves me any time but it just makes me happier, so I do it. I am so glad that I tried out this different path that day, it allowed me to change things up and make a little tweak to my life that changes my perspective and view on our surroundings.  I am going to try to do this more often and see where it leads me.

You got to cool it now!

Do you ever wonder if you have trained your kids in a way that works for the time being but may not be the best in the long run?  This can apply to so many things since teaching and training our kids to be good little citizens is so comprehensive. I do have one example that I wanted to share.

Ever since my kids were babies and starting to eat solid food I was always very careful to cool off their food before serving it to them.  I may have had an incident with my sister when she was a baby where I heated her baby food jar in the microwave and didn’t stir it up and cool it down, served it to her, and she screamed and it burned her little mouth.  I was kind of traumatized by it (she doesn’t remember it thankfully). Anyhow, my routine is to prepare the food, portion it out for the kids, and I let it cool before ever calling them down to eat. I time my meal preparation so that the food is plated and cooled by the time we are ready to eat.  The kids sit down to a meal that is almost always portioned and cooled so they can dig in right away (no one wants to deal with hangry kids).

This works out most of the time at home.  But we don’t always eat at home! It gets a little stressful for me when we are at people’s homes or at restaurants where the kids are ready to eat but a lot of the time the food is steaming hot (as it should be) and they get so impatient and want to eat.  I try to tell them to blow on the food and cut it up for them, but still, they are just so used to eating perfectly cooled food that it makes them so frustrated. And then mealtime becomes very tense and not as enjoyable.

It makes me kind of wish that I had trained my kids to at least be used to blowing on their own food sometimes or waiting at the table while their food cooled.  I guess in my mind I just figured I would let the kids go play and do other things while I prepared the meal ahead of time and would call them to eat when everything was ready to be eaten.

Over time I know that we will have plenty of instances where the kids will have to practice their patience with hot food and in time they’ll get used to it.  I don’t think I will go so far as to make it a permanent habit at home to serve the kids hot food. It just works for us to pre-cool the food before the kids sit down and want to eat.  So I’ll choose that short-term benefit for now!

Should I sleep or relax?

It seems silly to even be writing about this but I feel compelled to.  Lately I have been feeling kind of run down from the go-go-go of daily life and can’t wait for the end of the day.  The kids get to bed and I get to relax. Some nights I will read a book, other nights catch up on a show, and yes, some nights I will mindlessly scroll through social media on my phone.  Whatever it is I choose to do with my free time to wind down at night, I really enjoy it. The house is quiet, it’s dark outside, and I feel a sense of freedom.

Some nights I am just wiped from the day so I will literally fall asleep on the couch downstairs and my husband cannot wake me and has to help me upstairs.  I am out! On those nights I sleep the deepest of sleeps. But I wake up in the morning annoyed from the start because I went to sleep instead of using my time to relax!  

I know I know, the human body needs sleep.  It’s the only way we will survive. Our bodies rest and replenish from all we make them do during the day.  But, I can’t help being disappointed that while I was sleeping I missed out on having a dessert or snack, chatting with my husband, or catching up on a fun show.  

I always feel so much better when I get more sleep.  That’s for sure. But I get really excited about having some relax time too.  And to me, relaxation and sleep are not the same thing. Sleep is necessary and essential for our lives.  Relaxation is a luxury and I feel like it’s something I have “earned” at the end of a hard day.

I have accepted that some nights I will have to succumb to my body’s needs and just go to sleep.  But other nights if I get my second wind, I plan to do all the things that make me feel pampered and taken care of.

Meal Planning and Prep Hacks

I recently have been having some discussions with various cousins on my side and my husband’s side recently about meal planning and prep.  My husband and I are the oldest cousins so these younger cousins are working professionals, single and married, who live on their own and want to cook healthy meals that are simple, nutritious, and delicious.  I applaud them for their efforts and motivation to do so, because I was once a working professional living on my own and I remember this was a struggle.

I wanted to get some meal planning and prep ideas together to help our friends and family who might need a few ideas to get their own system started.  With meal planning and prep it’s all about coming up with your own customized system that you can continue to sustain long-term no matter how busy you are and no matter what life throws your way.  It needs to be easy and streamlined so you can get it done most weeks and also yummy and exciting enough that you enjoy what you are making and continue to be motivated to do so. So here’s what I have:

1. Meal plan week-by-week to start and progress to monthly- set aside one day a week (Saturday or Sunday may be easiest) to look at your week, check your schedule, and plan meals according to how much time you have and what’s going on.

2. Buy your groceries all at one time- if you can one-stop shop, have groceries delivered, or shop all in one day if you need to go to several stores.  Best to shop after you have planned your meals.

3. If you are cooking for one or two people know that you will have leftovers and be excited about them.  This means you can have lunch for a day or two, or some future dinners. If leftovers have you feeling meh you can jazz them up by reinventing them in to a new dish or adding some toppings that will change it up.  (Cooked proteins can easily be cut up and put in to a new dish for example. A rotisserie chicken or baked chicken breasts can be eaten with sides one night, shredded and put in to a sandwich for lunch one day, and shredded and put in to a soup for another dinner with a salad and bread,)

4. Consider making a few components of a meal(s) rather than dishes to give yourself some flexibility.  At the start of the week you can prepare 2 proteins (example salmon and chicken), 2 starches (rice and pasta), and veggies (such as steamed broccoli, carrots, and cauliflower and roasted zucchini and peppers).  You can keep these in containers in your fridge and mix and match as you wish for lunches or dinners throughout the week.

5. Consider freezing half of what you make if you are cooking for just a few people or you know you will have a lot leftovers that you won’t be able to/want to finish.  This is great for “mixed” dishes such as soups, stews, and casseroles. This is a time-saver as well because you put in the effort once to make the dish and then you have some for the same week (likely you’ll still have enough for a dinner or two and/or lunch) and then you can defrost and heat up the leftovers during a future week when you don’t have time to cook.  

6. Buy “meal prep” containers (Amazon and big box stores like Wal-Mart and Target have them) that have compartments and lids to freeze future meals.  This works well for the “component” type meals. So if you roast up a tray of sausage, grilled veggies, and prepare some quinoa you can fill up the meal prep containers and freeze them so you have individual meals prepared that you can take straight from the freezer to the microwave or defrost in the fridge if you take it out the night before you want to eat it.  You’ll thank yourself later for this!

7. You can structure your days of the week in to categories or themes to make meal planning easier, especially if meal planning is new to you, this cuts down the decisions you’ll need to make.  For example- meatless Monday, soup and salad Tuesday, Italian Wednesday, Asian Thursday, and breakfast for dinner Friday.

8. Don’t stop at just dinners plan out your breakfasts and lunches too.  A simple way to do this is just prepare one breakfast dish and one lunch dish (at most two) for the whole week.  You could make a batch of breakfast muffins, egg frittatas, overnight oats, or breakfast burritos and put them in the fridge for the week.  For lunches you could bake marinated chicken breasts, cut up raw vegetables, get a box of spring mix salad, and get pita and hummus and make meal prep boxes for the week.  You could make a cold noodle salad to serve with chicken or shrimp (both can be eaten cold). If you want a hot lunch you can make baked salmon or pork tenderloin to put in meal prep boxes with rice and roasted asparagus or brussel sprouts.  If you like sandwiches you can make freezer sandwiches by taking hawaiian rolls or sliced sandwich bread and filling them with turkey or ham and cheese and freezing them. You can thaw them in your lunch box and pack with spring mix, avocado/mayo, and cheese to add to your sandwich when you’re ready to eat.  Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches freeze well too.

9. Freeze raw meats for later.  If you get a pack of raw chicken on sale or steaks you can marinate them in gallon zipper bags and put one bag in the freezer for later.  Raw meats freeze and defrost really well and don’t lose any flavor or texture.

10. Don’t eat leftovers two days in a row, space them a part.  This sounds silly, but remember that leftovers are good in the fridge for 3 days (most of the time) so you don’t have to eat the same dinner two nights in a row.  You can have another dish the next day and come back to your leftovers on the third day, and I kid you not, this makes leftovers a lot more tolerable.

These are just some of my meal planning and prep hacks that I have found along the way.  I hope that this helps inspire you!

Why I stopped hiding veggies in my kids’ food...

I think it’s safe to say that a lot of us parents want to get as many veggies in our kids as possible.  The problem is that some kids just don’t want to eat that many veggies when there are so many other options.  When my kids were younger I would opt to “hide” the veggies in their food so they wouldn’t scowl and make a big stink about eating the veggies.  I would make blended veggie muffins, I would put diced veggies in pasta sauce, I would make blended soups loaded with veggies, I would put veggies in smoothies, and pretty much any other way I could sneak the veggies in to their food I did.  This worked great to ensure that the kids got the veggies in their little bodies. But after some time I realized my kids were getting the veggies in, but they weren’t able to identify the vegetables they were eating and weren’t getting their palates used to the taste and textures of all the vegetables I would serve.  My husband and I talked about it and we came to the conclusion that the ultimate goal was to teach the kids about different vegetables and we wanted to expose them to different veggies and different preparation of veggies so their palates would become accustomed to them. Sure it’s great to sneak extra veggies in their food, no harm there, but I started making an effort to serve just sides of straight veggies prepared in different ways.  I started out just steaming the veggies whole, then stir frying them with more flavor, and roasting them. At first this was met with a lot of protest, because of course the kids weren’t used to it and didn’t want it. But we basically made them try the dishes every single meal and over time they got used to it and started recognizing the different tastes and textures and developing preferences for what veggies they like. It’s hard to deal with the pushback that kids can give sometimes, for sure, but as parents we have to pick our battles and decide what we are willing to give in on and what is important enough for us to push through.

Give me all the straws!

I am well aware that we all need to do our part to protect our earth.  We need to reduce, reuse, recycle and be mindful of what we consume and how we consume it.  I know that there is a shift towards more sustainable everything and less waste, especially of things that are not biodegradable and would cause more harm than benefit to our environment.  I realize that straws are really not important or vital to human beings, in the big scheme of things. We can find other ways to drink beverages without straws or at least without disposable straws.  I think it’s great that many restaurants and cafes are starting to ban straws in an effort to decrease the waste. But, I have to say, that I really like using straws. I prefer a straw to just drinking out of a cup or even a cup with a spout.  I like the way it feels and how clean it is, not to mention how it helps keep my teeth (coffee, tea, etc) and my clothes clean (I am very clumsy) when I am drinking something. I also like giving my kids straws because it’s just cleaner and neater.  I do use reusable straws and water bottles and cups with built in straws when I am home. But I use plenty of disposable straws when I am on the run or if I get a drink for my kids out and about. We use it once and we throw it away. I wish I could say that I felt really bad every time I did this but to be honest I don’t.  I try to be mindful about waste and being cleaner and less harsh on our environment but when it comes to straws they are so convenient for me and make my life so much easier I don’t give it a second thought. It’s really hard to be mindful of things all the time in all facets of life in every way. I imagine others may not have this issue with straws but maybe there’s something else that you just can’t give up?

Book Worming

A few years ago I decided to get back in to reading books.  I say this because before kids, I loved to read for fun, but once I had my son I just didn’t make it a priority anymore.  One in awhile I would read a parenting book out of desperation for answers but nothing for pleasure. I found satisfaction in quick blog reads or social media entries or articles people would post on Facebook, but not a real book cover to cover.

So I decided it was time to get my eyes off the screens for awhile and really delve in to some juicy reads.  The problem was that I didn’t know what to read and I didn’t want to spend too much money and take up too much space with books.  So what I decided to do was peruse the library bookstore. We were always at the library for storytime or so that the kids could borrow lots of books.  I tried borrowing books myself but I ran in to the issue of not being able to get the popular books I wanted and not reading them fast enough and kept having overdue books, so that got stressful.  I started a routine where I would give myself 15 minutes to go through the paperback book trolleys at the front of the bookstore and would grab as many books as I found remotely interesting. Sure these were not all prize-winning life-altering novels, some were and some weren’t. But it was a fun way to get a variety of books so I could have a selection to choose from at home without any pressure to finish in a week or two and they were inexpensive so I could re-donate them or give them to friends when I was done.

By doing this (and I continue to do this now, years later) I have been able to start and finish mounds of books.  It’s been fun to go through the books I chose and change up the types of books I am reading. It is satisfying for me to finish the books and it is an escape for me at the end of the day to immerse myself in a world different from my own.

There are unique books that I do seek out and for those I will buy them at the store or on Amazon, but those are one in 10.  I find pleasure in reading the recycled reads and have been surprised at the different types of books that I find interesting.  I am supporting my local library and I am getting back to something I always enjoyed doing. I always want to foster a love of reading for my kids and now I do the same for myself!